Guys & Gaming.

I want baubles from the X’mas tree as a present.

AND GUESS WHAT I’VE TO MAKE MY WAY DOWN TO THE POLICE STATION TO GET UM ‘QUESTIONED’ (i put it real nicely) AGAIN HOMG HOMG HOMG

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!

I MEAN I KNOW THEY AREN’T SCARY AND ALL BUT UH

wlao i dont want lah :(

ITS LIKE A REVISIT OF THE PAST WHICH I HAVE COVERED UP SO NICELY WITH NICE MEMORIES ALREADY AND THEN YOU GO AND DIG EVERYTHING UP AGAIN VERY SONG IJIT TO PLAY WITH ME HUH

NOW I CANNOT FEEL RESTED ALREADY LAH!!!!!

f4

Girls are difficult creatures.

Okay here’s the thing. I’ve a problem with this guy who’s gaming addicted. And he only comes and talk to me when uh… his friends stop playing with him or when he gets bored of gaming.

And what does his addiction have anything to do with me, you ask?

IM HIS FRIGGIN GF FOR THE SWEET LOVE OF GOD!

I feel treated like some spare tyre!!

I mean whatcha know, this happened with my ex too. I got frustrated and flared up at him and said alot of hurtful things.

And he willingly repented and learnt his lesson.

This time? I try to talk it out and he goes all ”cmon la i need my space”! What the hell? Space? Not like I’m clinging to you 24/7 or something. In fact, I’m being extremely distant already, we don’t even have regular proper convos FFS.

And then I was so exasperated that I actually CRIED (no this didnt happen with my ex, I didn’t cry because he relented -_-”), and up till now my current still DOESN’T change.

… Even if he did, whenever he initiates a convo, I’d probably bite. I mean what the hell I’ve gone through this again and again, of course I’m tired and exasperated. He’d be like, ”lol hi” and then I’d be all ”eh today never dota ah?”. Or something bitter like that. And then if I detect even the slightest reluctance in his words, I’d immediately flare. (eff, gotta do something bout that temper of mine ._o)

And go, ”you know if your words are gonna sound so forced then in the first place dont initiate a convo with me la, whats the use of having a forced convo?! go back to your dota la if your really so unhappy with this” and get really pissed to tears again. Then he’d get really exasperated with me too and say ”…….. zz what can i do if you dont accept anything?!” and then we’d like fight and I’d end up in tears again and then it’d gradually lead to a breakup because of the constant friction and I’d be really really down like how I was last time again. Trust me, it doesn’t feel good.

What the fuck is wrong with me? I don’t like to force things on people, but I just feel this gaming thing is detrimental to this r/s. Well his screwy priority is already detrimental, actually. Like if his friends asked him to have a game with them and we were in the midst of a convo, he’d immediately drop the convo and go with them.

How do I know this? Well he bloody told it to my face. If his priorities are gonna be so fucked up, I’ve every mind to be as fucked up as he is.

But doing that’d be quite damn unhealthy to the r/s too, so…

I’m at a dead end, I’m losing my touch.

Damn!

~Sorrento

WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!

Interesting… blog title, isn’t it? Kinda all in-your-faceish, obscene, vulgar and all things yiffy, no? Random spam, I like :)

****EVEN THOUGH THIS POST MIGHT LOOK MEANINGLESS AND SPAMMISH, IT’S WORTH A READ!!!!!****

SO ANYWAY AH I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL’S UP WITH GUYS’ FETISH FOR GAMES LEH! ASSHOLE SIA THEY’D PRIORITIZE GAMES IN FRONT OF EVERYTHING ELSE INCLUDING THEIR GF AND FOR SOME EXCEPTIONAL ONES, THEIR MOTHER?! I MEAN OKAY I KNOW WERY ADDICTING AND ALL AND THE MERE THOUGHT OF GAMING MAKES YOU ORGASM BUT CAN YOU DON’T BE EFFING RUDE AND LIKE GO ”OH UH TTYL I GO DOTA” WHEN YOU’RE IN THE MIDST OF A GODDAMNED CONVERSATION?!?!?!

OMFG YOU GUYS NEED TO BE ASSRAPED TO WAKE UP SERIOUSLY! WHICH OF MY EX-ES WEREN’T HEAVILY INVOLVED IN GAMING HUH?! NONE! ITS LIKE BOTH OF YOU WALK WALK WALK AND THEN SUDDENLY SOME RANDOM TOM DICK HARRY POPS UP AND SHOWS HIM A COMPUTER WITH ALL HIS FAVOURITE MMPORG/FPS/RTS GAMES IN IT AND I ASSURE YOU HE’D IMMEDIATELY PLOP HIMSELF IN FRONT OF IT AND START GAMING INTENSIVELY WITH ABSOLUTELY NO REGARD TO YOUR PRESENCE AT ALL!

You know what? Last time I was pretty darn bothered by it when my ex-es were so involved with their games that we fought, but now…

I DONT CARE YOU CAN ALL TAKE A FLYING LEAP AND JUMP INTO A POOL OF CUM :)

Stupid idiots, if we girls bother you bout your games kena ‘kan’, then lead to more unpretty stuff so why bother, I ask? Gaming in excess is of course, detrimental to you so I hope you all fail your N’s/O’s/A’s and get your balls bust and you penises bitten off and your eyeballs jabbed out etc etc.

Im not gna get angry im not gna show im ticked off im not gna do anything even though im DAMN tempted to ignore your convos everytime you initiate one and go ”OOOOOPS AUDITION MATCH :(” and see how you like it cos one day you’re bound to get pissed off and I know it and then we’d fight and omg I don’t like to fight thus I’m trying damn hard to not submit to my childish, vengeful desires to get my own back.

I HATE BOYS!!!!!

YES ALL OF YOU BECAUSE OF A COUPLE OF BLACK SHEEP IN AN ENTIRE FLOCK OF BLACK SHEEP IM CONVINCED THAT THERE’RE NO WHITE SHEEP AND AM THUS CONVINCED TO RETHINK MY SEXUAL PREFERANCE AND WILL CONVINCE THE WORLD’S FEMALE POPULATION TO FOLLOW MY FOOTSTEPS AND RECONSIDER THEIR SEXUAL PREFERENCES TOO AND PERHAPS THEN YOU MEN WILL FINALLY REALIZE THAT DOTA/MAPLE/CS/PORN/WHATEVER SHITTY GAME ISNT YOUR FUCKING PENIS/GF/LIFE BECAUSE GAMES CAN NEVER BE A SUBSTITUTE TO A WOMAN’S VAJAJA!

So there.

P.S I feel like making a public blog, but of course I’ll still be faithfully updating this blog every now and then :)~

~Sorrento

Absence.

Well I’m kinda back.

Wonderin’ what’s been happening down here? KX, if you knew, you’d probably be disappointed in me. Honestly speaking, I’ve no idea what’s up with me too <_<.

I’m trying damn hard to keep myself emotionally detached in this ‘r/s’ thing. That’s why I can’t discern my feelings! Yes, maybe there’s an apparent fondness somewhere in there, but that’s inevitable, isn’t it! Even I know that I don’t have that interested feel like I usually would have in potential candidates! So why am I still doing this o_O.

What’s more, I don’t even know if your serious. Like someone said… Maybe I’m being used as a sex toy or something, meh. I don’t know and probably don’t want to know. As they say, ignorance is bliss what. Mixed signals all the while, you tell me, how do I find out? We all speak different ‘languages’, and yet words are but words. Used as tools to manipulate one to your favour, or something more?

Mebbe it’s due to your non-committal, flippant attitude that makes me feel that insecurity, makes me feel that odd lack of sure-footedness. Then again, I’m also being downright non-committal, ain’t I? Of course I am, we even talked bout reciprocating and me once, remember? If I WAS more sure and ‘confident’, I’d reciprocate with sincerity somehow. Maybe. Knowing how bitchy I am, making me reciprocate would take a hell lot of dedication, no?

Are YOU up to it?

Or am I not worth the effort.

Ah well, whatever it is… Let’s hope I can keep up with my detached facade without coming apart. Don’t want to go through what I did last time. And this time round, I’m damn sure it isn’t me feeling faithless. Dead confident it isn’t me.

KX I’VE STARTED POSTING, SO… YOUR CUE!

xD

…Just realized that my life’s just like those stereotypical shoujo mangas that girls indulge in. You know those school-lifeish, romance, sex… Yeah. Just like that, the EXACT same thing, minus the romance part. I’ve no idea why, maybe it’s just me or something. I want to feel it, but somehow I can’t really. Or maybe I just refuse to let myself feel that way. Call me unappreciative. And then if my RL friend found out, she’d go all IM SO ENVIOUS HOMG I WISH I WERE YOU YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LUCKY YOU ARE. After all, she wants a manga boyfriend to be her BF. Quite stupid ah, knowing that no one in RL is that perfect. Now I’m in her fantasy, mightaswell learn to appreciate stuff that I have.

… But how?

P.S – Sex is NO fun.

”Maybe it’s just me, Couldn’t you believe
That everything I said and did, wasn’t just deceiving”

- Secondhand Serenade, Maybe

~Sorrento

Waltz of the Disappointed

My English is bombing, sigh.

No I’m not being spazzy and all, I’m not that frickin annoying. It IS bombing. So I got back my results today and I went O_O HOMFGWDF and then T_T and ._. . In case you were wondering, the last emoticon represents bitter acceptance.

Most people’d probably go ”EH BUT YOU PASS WHAT!!!!! WHY SO SAD NOT LIKE YOU FAIL RIGHT”, but you gotta be in my shoes to understand leh. See ah all along your English standard has always been of a different, a higher calibre. And suddenly BOOM it drops to average. Stop being sucha stuck-up perfectionist? I’m not being a damn perfectionist, do you honestly think I give a rat’s ass about studies? I dunno it’s just frickin disappointing to me I feel so ee mo. Average, god damn effing average.

HOW IS IT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME?! My other results are already messed up as it is, scraping passes and amazing failures, of course all my hopes are banked on my English!

Heartbreak cannot be silenced :(

What is wrong with me?! Even my English was way better for my previous years! Now? Pfft it’s like of some commonplace standard, hopefully not lower. I can’t regain my skills once it’s gone leh.

Sigh…

Screw this shit.

Anyhow…

*tries to get on the brighter side*

This familiar feel of heartache is back again. And no it’s not related to my English at all, that’s damn gay.

Fuck no I don’t want to be in a R/S again, I had enough I’m extremely carefree like this, I definitely don’t need love!

Dear God, please tell me my senses are wrong, please tell me I’m thinking too much, please tell me this is just a nightmare…

Maybe it’s my fault, I shouldn’t have gave off all the wrong signals, I shouldn’t have been so open-minded.

;_;

And nuh it’s not me in love, my heart is far more content when I’m not messing with that shit.

….

KX, poke me when you’re online. Tell you more bout this shit.

I need someone to tell me that I’m thinking too much.

I don’t want to mull over this shit every day and night, I effing do not want to.

What can I say,

I regret.

I admit I can’t bring myself to talk to you, I don’t know why but…

Yeah.

Sometimes I just don’t want to think bout it, sometimes I realize that I’ve to face reality and the consequences of my own actions, sometimes I feel I’m frickin stupid.

I really am loose :(

This is becoming quite depressing, haha.

~Sorrento

Judge.

There’s more to me than you’d like to think.

I hate how you’re so assuming, judgemental, frank, direct and self-righteous.

You lack tact of every aspect, IMO.

Just because YOU are easygoing doesn’t mean OTHERS are as easygoing, wdf. Just because you’re used to seeing a person’s demeanour, antics, behaviour, w/e, doesn’t mean that you can anyhow jump into conclusions and gehsiao, acting as if you know that person inside out what. Seriously lor I frickin’ hate how you’re like that.

You bitch about people behind their backs, okay that’s normal, but hell can you like show more appreciation to your friends or not? From some 3rd party’s point of view, you’re using them for your entertainment and needs leh. Machiam a kid with toys like that, disgusts me.

Okay lah, I’ll give credit for being so dead honest with me (or so I presume) but…

-_-

I don’t like how you seem. If I didn’t know you well, if I was just some tom dick harry by the streets, the first impression I’d get’s that you’re a simple easy-going boy.

Unfortunately I’ve come this far, and have met with the shocking realization that you’re definitely not what you seem to be. You don a mask of simplicity.

You judge people without a moment’s hesitation, you speak with that air of a philosopher whom have been around as long as Jesus has been, but in actual fact…

You’re just a sly, cunning person with only 16 years of knowledge.

You may assume that you know people more well than any other, okay I’ll agree. But I don’t like the reason behind it. You observe every single movement, gesture, antics, behavioural quirks of people and HELL trust me, no one likes to be effing observed like some lab rat.

I accept the fact that you’re who you are, but…

You’re just sucha fucking cunt at times that what you said yesterday made me gloomy for the whole of fucking today.

”I don’t know how to break this to you but… you’re getting boring.’

WDF OKAAAAAY if I’m damned boring then you can seriously go and find someone who’s far more interesting. I accept criticism, but not baseless ones, not ones with no rhyme and reason. Maybe it’s because I have a tendency to repeat certain expressions like ”WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU” and ”WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM” (of course, with an air of kidding-ishness). Perhaps it’s because I’m terribly bored/rendered speechless/just cannot click with you/don’t feel like saying anything else/don’t know how to put my ideas across/behavioural quirk.

IM GETTING BORING AFTER YOU MET ME?

k yeah great.

I may have that ‘dumb blonde’ air, but don’t assume I’m what I seem to be lah can? You can look down on me because I seem so slow and thick almost all the time, but can you don’t forget that I got feelings also? Insensitive, tactless jerk.

And then gets me wondering how I can continuously talk to an ‘english-oriented’ person for months and months without running outta stuff to talk about, or getting ‘boring’.

Maybe it’s because the chase has ended and the suspense has been broken, you know how I am in RL, you know how I am online and you’d like to think that you can conclude that you know me like you’ve known me for 10 years.

Think again.

I’m giving ‘boring’ replies, bothering to not ignore you and deprive you of my ‘boring’ self, and I think that’s fucking good enough. If you’re gonna be so fucking fussy about how you’d like the person to be, dude. Go fucking find someone to waste your time on, I’m not fucking worth it since I’m so blah and boring.

Seriously I’ve never met someone who nitpicks into the effing finest details so much that it pisses me off. Just because I act that I’m cool with it doesn’t mean I really am, you know. I’m being ‘cool’ with everything because I don’t favour conflict very much and I don’t like to hate either.

So ya lol.

You can think that just because you go around ‘entertaining’ everyone and live as an ‘entertainer’ you can go around fudging judging others, but m’dear once you reach the ‘outside’ world, the song is sung to another tune!

…

Sometimes I wish I never knew you.

What can I say, I’m darn gloomy and depressing. When you give me a reason to feel that way, of course.

I may seem

CLINICALLY DEPRESSED

but in actual fact

I’m just

TIRED

Scribbled that randomshit thing down during my exams and thought it’d make a nice tshirt slogan. You can replace the ‘clinically depressed’ and ‘tired’ with anything else that pleases you, kinda like a mood tshirt thing, but way cooler than those overrated ‘Little Miss ________’ tshirts.

And those emoshit people can put

I may seem

HAPPY

but in actual fact

I’m just

EMO

\dry laugh

I haven’t felt real gloomy for a long, long time. Thanks for getting me down, you’re a great friend.

~Sorrento

Dressed to Impress

AH JEEZ WDF

I think I fell for someone yet AGAIN.

Ya you heard it, AGAIN. WDF is wrong with me? -_-

I’m sucha sucker for open-minded people… sigh. I PRAY LIKE NUTS THAT THIS IS JUST ANOTHER OF MY MOMENTARY INFATUATIONS THAT’D GO AWAY IN LIKE A WEEK OR TWO but who am I kidding, I might’ve fallen deep. DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN this sucks majorly.

It’d be like another blast to the past, where I used to feel so down and ee mo everywhere I went, when my laughter didn’t rid me of all emotions negative, when I was so brittle, weak and fall-apartish.

So yeah, the hell. THE HELL, I am absolutely content with how I am now, I mean how my life is now. If I let myself get tangled up again, I’d un-learn to live life for myself and not for others. And can you imagine that… oh the horror lah. Seriously I DIE DIE don’t want to revert to who I used to be, frickin’ swear.

I hate this hormones shit, screws me up big time.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

-_-

So anyway! I’VE FOUND A NEW LOVE!!!!!!! LINGERIE SHOPPING ^-^

-SUGARHAPPY-

SERIOUSLY I could start making a list of what I’d like to buy

-x- Pierre Cardin boyshorts [DID YOU SEE THOSE COLOURS, THEY WERE AWESOMESHIT]

-x- Some more randomshit cheerful-coloured bras [ENOUGH OF SPORTSBRAS ALREADY, BAH]

quite short lah, but if I hope for too much money would be spent like green tea.

I’M QUITE BUGGED BY SOMETHING LEH

so I bought this randomshit redskinnyscarf from some unknown online person, transferred the money into her account already and UNTIL NOW she hasn’t replied me. It has been like 3 days….

God.

WHAT IF I GET SCAMMED

:(

I’D BE DEVASTATED LIKE NUTS

-prays damn hard someone jio me out for study date tomorrow-

I DON’T WANNA STAY HOME ALL DAY NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

And uh about the song thing

; _;

I know I’ve been complacent and shit, because I write songs only when I’ve inspiration

My major exams are like in a day, so ya I’ll put it on hold til I’m done with that shit.

~Sorrento

BOOM CHIKKA BANG BANG

HAHAHAHAHA I AM SO GOING TO MY WHITE NAIL POLISH AND MY DICKIES BAGPACK AND HOPEFULLY A NEW MP3 IF I HAVE THE MUNNEH BECAUSE MY STUPID ASSHOLE CHEAPSKATE 30 BUCK CHINA MICKEY MP3 DECIDED TO DO A PAKISTANI SUICIDE BOMBER AND.. AND….

; _;

DIE ON ME HOMG WDF THAT STUPID SHIT HOW DARE IT DIE ON THE LIKES OF ME I WASN’T EVEN DONE WITH IT YET I MEAN HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO PASS MY DAYS WITHOUT AMBLING DOWN SLEEPILY EVERYDAY AT LIKE 7AM WITH INSANELY LOUD AND EE MO MUSIC PLUGGED INTO MY CUTE LITTLE EARS AND TODAY WAS HELL ENOUGH I WAS SO SHOCKED AND ANGERED THAT I HAD THAT ‘BUAY SONG’ LOOK PLASTERED CLEARLY ON MY FACE FOR THE WORLD TO SEE FOR THE ENTIRE DAY THROUGHOUT AND I FEEL SO GLOOMY WDF CAN YOU IMAGINE NO MORE MUSIC AT NIGHT HOW AM I GONNA SLEEP HUH NO MORE MUSIC IN THE MORLENGS, ON MY WAY BACK HOME, EVERYWHERE HOMG THE HORROR !!!!!!

I AM SO SAD

:(

on a brighter side im really really poorshit right now and if my marler finds out what i did she’d go ballistic but lets put that behind us shall we

:D

AHAHAHAH OCH ON WEDDY WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IM HERE TO BUST THE STUPID RUMORS BOUT IT BEING FRICKIN HAUNTED ILL EVEN TAKE PICTURES FOR YALL TO SEE WITH MY SOOPER DOOPER 2MP CAMPHONE EHEHEHEHEHE

E-DA-ME-ME LOLOL

and uh ill work on the song when i get into the song making mood :< i cant really do music and tunes though, just will work on some larbishy lyrics during a boring period in school ^-^

TIL THEEEEEN TOODLES BAIBAI YAY

i am so sexcited, can you IMAGINE! WHITE NAILS I’LL CREATE A DAMN REVOLUTION FUCK YEAH

kinda forgotten what i wanted to say so ill say it if i ever remember loves

~Sorrento